From the Green Room: Endorsements
Monday, May 17, 2010 
Celebrity endorsements have been around for as long as time itself. When archeologists first discovered King Tut’s opulent remains also found in the sarcophagus a hieroglyphic filled scroll, that, when translated, turned out to be a cave painting of the boy king in what is thought to be a crude advertisement for “Ra Scarabs: They’re Beetleriffic!”
It’s one thing when the famous lend their images and likenesses to sell product; you can respect that Joe Dimaggio made Marilyn Monroe type money selling Joe for Mr. Coffee, and that Sally Field cashed in on her osteoporosis by shilling Boniva to keep herself in Yoga mats forever. But when one celebrity goes to bat in defense of another, there’s a sweet, special symmetry that you just don’t see all that often. But Woody Allen coming out at Cannes in support of Roman Polanski, seems, well, just a tad misguided.
One pedophile standing up for another pedophile. Gives you a real warm feeling, don’t it?
That’s on the list of bad ideas right up there with Jeffrey Dahmer doing a “Beef: It’s What For Dinner” commercial. You can’t have the guy who took nude pictures of a 15-year-old stand up for the guy who had sex with a 15-year-old. It’s the ultimate definition of conflict of interest.
It’d be like Senator Larry Craig endorsing Rev. George Rekers; John Edwards standing behind Tiger Woods; and Captain Joe Hazelwood of the Exxon Valdez vouching for BP. 
So don’t be surprised if the next time you turn on your radio you hear a promo in a thin, weak, heavily accented voice saying, “This is Osama Bin Laden. When I’m between caves and can actually get reception, I’m listening to my brother-from-another-mother: Imus in the Morning.”
It could happen.
