From the Green Room: The SEC

The most frustrating thing about the current economic crisis in our country was that nobody seemed to be able to articulate one salient reason for it.  There were many theories, postulations and allegations, none of which really provided any insight into the money meltdown of the past couple of years. Until now. 

Apparently, some of the workers at the SEC, the agency charged with being the “watchdog” of the financial industry, let a few things like Bernie Madoff slip through the cracks because they were too busy downloading internet porn at work. I always suspected those accountants were a horny little bunch. But who knew that instead of keeping track of interest rates and sea changes in the futures market, those nerdy number crunchers were cruising sites like YouPorn. Naughty.com. and Skankwire.  

One wonders what type of porn the frisky finance freaks preferred. Were they watching dirty movies? “Debbie Does Derivatives?” “The Devil and Dow Jones?”  “Deep Fiduciary?” Jenna Jameson, naked in a chair, talking about fixed dividends would probably get them pretty hot. Perhaps the guys at SEC were into B&D. Or S&M.   

Probably not.  Because, when you think about it, we were the ones who ultimately got beaten up.  And then screwed.