Live From the Greenroom
Although we arrive at the Fox Studios in the middle of another effing snowstorm, our spirits and bodies are rejuvenated by the day off, knowing full well that, three minutes into the program, we will all be contemplating the legal and moral ramifications of murder/suicide.
I chose to observe the President's Day holiday by spending five bucks on a frozen cherry pie, just so Abraham Lincoln and George Washington would both be represented. The I-Man spent his day off sending threatening E-Mails to me and Tony, just so we wouldn't 'Miss Him'. Thankfully, we didn't. The Emails helped with that.
Dagen McDowell stopped by while Bo Dietl was in studio, still giddy over the Daytona 500. Apparently, her trailer is fitted with a satellite dish so she was getting the live feed from the track, allowing her to watch the entire two and a half hour pothole repair. This girl really knows how to party.
The 'Favorite Five Songs' contest winner will be joining us in the studio this morning, a gentleman by the name of Jim Monroe who hails from Kentucky. He won a small cash prize plus the opportunity to stand in a corner and watch 'the magic' of the Imus in the Morning broadcast taking place live, and in person. The second prize winner received NO money, but gets to watch the program every day for the next month. I am told the third place winner will receive a staff position. Jim owns a frame company and a Godfather's Pizza franchise. So it's almost a sure thing that Don Corleone will want to wet his beak in those proceeds, not to mention a 75% commission on the cash prize. You know, for protection. After all, New York can be a dangerous place for a Kentuckian. Jim's list includes 'In My Life' by the Beatles, 'When I Paint My Masterpiece' by The Band, and 'Bohemian Rhapsody', but not the classic rendition by Freddie Mercury, but the version recorded by Hank Williams Jr.. Jim obviously has better taste in music than he does morning radio programs.
In studio, Imus spends a good thirty five minutes chastising our dear, sweet production assistant, Carley, for placing his cowboy hat brim down. In between her sobs of contrition, he maintains it destroys the integrity of the hat. I think it's an awful lot of time and effort to spend over a stupid hat, but I actually prefer it brim up as it makes it much easier to pee in.
The folks from Sunrise Detox have come to present Jim with his giant 2500 dollar check. I wonder if they've also brought a giant Bic Pen for him to endorse it. I also wonder if they have a program for curing me of my cherry pie addiction.