Larry King's Thoughts of the Day
What's the deal with the paper strip on motel toilets? I feel like I’m peeing on a beauty pageant contestant. Not that it would have been the first time.
Here's what America wants to know about Señor Wences. Did he ever put the lipstick and eyes on his hand before he touched himself?
One of the little known facts about Ethel Merman is, she had an un-descended testicle.
If I could have any super power at all, I’d want heat vision. That way I could toast marshmallows without burning my scrotum on the campfire.
You know, after you’ve carried it in your pants for a day or so, a jelly donut tastes entirely different.
A lot of people believe Oswald acted alone. Not true. I know for a fact, that he belonged to a small community theatre group.
Jessica Tandy. Ever bounce yer One Eyed Wonder Wand off her Sister Biscuit? Pile Drive Miss Daisy? "Bring the car around, Hoke, Daddy's gonna tear off a piece in the back seat."
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