Deirdre Imus & Lis Wiehl Won't Let the I-Man Get Them Down

Imus began today’s spot with Deirdre Imus and Lis Wiehl by criticizing them both, which may not have been the best road to go down.

To his wife, he said, “The name of your center is so cumbersome.” To Lis, he grumbled, “Rather than wasting your time with frivolous, nonsense novels…you should look into a murder mystery or something where there’s some controversy, and write about that.”

They both addressed his silly remarks, Deirdre by pointing out the good work she does and Lis by saying she uses true stories from her federal prosecutor days and simply changes names to protect the guilty.

In her most recent novel, Hand of Fate , Lis also changed the name of the main character, a radio host based on Bill O’Reilly, with whom she worked for seven years.

“I’m not one of those people who thinks it’s about him,” Imus gloated. “I know it’s about O’Reilly.”

Well, bully for you.

As a result of the I-Man’s power, Deirdre will meet today with New Jersey Governor Chris Christie at an undisclosed location to talk about children’s health and cleaning products in the state.

“I can tell you that we’re not meeting at a fast food restaurant,” she offered. Not helpful.

People who might soon work at fast food restaurants—Goldman Sachs executives—testified on Capitol Hill yesterday, and the timing of the event made Deirdre suspicious.

“We have an election year coming up,” she said. “Don’t you think the bigger picture is, with Obama and the Democrats, like all Presidents, they pick their enemies? Like Bill Clinton did with the right-wing conspiracy, and now it’s the Tea Partiers?”

To which her husband lovingly replied, “I’ll ask the questions, sweetheart.”

That is, after all, his job, something he works at all day, even after he leaves the studio. But as his wife and son see it, he’s simply watching television.

“The quintessential piece of drama from yesterday was when Coburn asked Blankfein about throwing Frenchie under the bus,” said Imus, referring to yesterday’s Goldman Sachs hearings. “I found out about that through my research at 6:47 last night.”

Moving on to even more fiery issues, Lis told Imus the immigration law passed in Arizona last week will pass constitutional muster because it’s mimicking a federal law.

“The real issue is going to be reasonable suspicion, that’s the test,” she said, referring to the right given law enforcement officers and citizens to question those they believe to be illegal immigrants. Besides, only the federal government has jurisdiction to deport, something she knows well, being a former federal prosecutor and all.

“Do your job then!” Imus said, clearly not understanding the meaning of the word “former.”

Then, he called his guest “liberal scum,” shut off hers and Deirdre’s microphones, and wildly declared, “We’re taking our country back, and we’re going to give it to the Navajos!”

Good luck with that.

-Julie Kanfer