Despite The Lord's Intervention, Sen. Bob Kerrey Insisted NYC Trials Are The Way To Go

If there's one thing former United States Senator Bob Kerrey proved this morning, it's that he has the ability to make Imus fold like a cheap suit. Contrary to Imus's opinion, Kerrey, now President of the New School University, applauded Attorney General Eric Holder's decision to hold the 9/11 masterminds' trials in New York City.

"I think they should have done it earlier," said Kerrey, who served on the 9/11 Commission. "I think it's the right thing to do. You bring them to New York, they're going to get a fair trial. We've done it before."

Kerrey was referring to the trial and conviction of those who planned the 1993 World Trade Center bombings, which Imus said "hardly compares" to the horrors of 9/11. Acknowledging the difference, Kerrey nonetheless believes Khalid Sheikh Mohammed and the handful of other goofballs involved should be brought to justice here in the U.S.

Moments after Kerrey made this point, the line went dead. Was it the Lord, sick of listening to this nonsense, acting in mysterious ways? We think so.

Sadly, the connection was reestablished, and Kerrey blithered on, admitting a military tribunal would be a more effective way to try Mohammed and others.

Imus has enormous respect for Kerrey, and was disturbed that their opinions were not in line, which led him to believe...

"Maybe I'm wrong all the time?" Kerrey said. Or maybe Imus is missing something.

"It's not a clear case," Kerrey continued. "I just think it's the right course of action. You're much more likely to get to a point where the victims and their families say, 'Justice has been done.'"

Imus argued that the bombers of the USS Cole were being tried in a military tribunal, since their target was clearly militaristic. The Penatgon, which was hit on 9/11, is, as Imus said, "obviously not a deli."

Kerrey insisted this story needs to be told, if for no other reason than to quiet the wacky conspiracy theorists who still believe 9/11 was carried out by George W. Bush. Besides, Mohammed has already confessed to his crime, albeit after 183 rounds of water-boarding.

"After about the third or the fifteenth time you're water-boarded, wouldn't it occur to you that maybe you're not going to die?" Imus wondered. "Would you think you were going to die every single time? How dumb is this guy?"

That question is beyond Kerrey's jurisdiction, and so is the constitutionality of affording the rights of U.S. citizens to non-citizens facing trial here. Regardless, he's happy it works that way, because "it's the right thing to do."

"I'm against this," Imus declared, then said, "But you may be right."

-Julie Kanfer