From the Green Room: Merci, Marie Claire

Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it.  That’s either a quote from Confucius or from a fortune cookie, which, incidentally, was the original delivery system for wisdom way before the advent of Snapple Marie Claire modelCaps.  

The French have, once again, shown their progressive thinking by embracing a form of beauty that heretofore has gone unrecognized.  In the French edition of the fashion magazine Marie Claire, there is a photo editorial featuring topless women; it is unique not in that they are bare-chested, but because the models are all of the plus-size variety.  

That’s right.  Fat girls are finally getting their due.

Fetish magazines like BBW and Tons O’ Fun notwithstanding, overweight gals have not traditionally been the subject of such pictorials. I suppose that the market for nude Lulu Roman types would be considered niche at best.  But if beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder, then heavyset heroines should be Also a Marie Claire modelmore prolific in publications, since 99 percent of the guys reading nudie magazines are hideously, morbidly obese shmoes themselves.

This is huge news from an industry where any girl above a size 2 is considered chunky.  Let’s face it: beefy roller derby queens don’t suffer from bulimia. So to have ladies who are somewhat against type on the pages of Vanity Fair and Cosmopolitan is not only a refreshing change of pace, it’s far more realistic.

Think about it. When was the last time you were at the Walmart and saw a babe like Scarlett Johansseon in the canned meat aisle?  How often has the young woman in the visor behind the drive-thru window at Hardees resembled Penelope Cruz? And few women working at the Department of Motor Vehicles looks like Naomi Campbell. Does not work at DMV

Though these plus-size women are not the sort you’d find distributing parking tickets in New York City, the French are celebrating that women are like Grand Prix racing tracks: the more curves they have, the more exciting they are. Thumbing through the June issue of the French Marie Claire (to which I subscribe for the hard-hitting journalism), you will find that these women have tremendous sex appeal. These Meaty Mamas are H.O.T.

About the only thing you can say about this turn of events is that it promotes a hideous double standard.  I’m a triple D cup myself. You don’t see French Marie Claire calling me for layout.  

Quite frankly, I’m hurt.  But it’s nothing a sheet cake can’t cure.