When You Think Royal Wedding You Think...Colin Quinn?

Moments after Prince William and Kate Middleton kissed (twice!) on the balcony of Buckingham Palace in front of throngs of people, Colin Quinn swooped much less romantically into the Imus in the Morning studio and declared, “That was a real English love tap, wasn’t it?”
 
That Imus had asked Quinn, a comedian, to provide commentary on the events of earlier this morning in London was “absurd,” in Quinn’s view, though he noted of our very own “Margaret Thatcher,” “I think Rob really has taken it too far. His love for dress-up goes way beyond even transvestitism.”
 
Quinn was once married, but is no longer part of that club. He has a girlfriend, he told Imus, but unlike hordes of other women around the globe, she expressed no interest in the royal wedding.
 
“She’s from New Jersey,” Quinn explained. “They don’t go for this kind of thing.”
 
Various wedding receptions will be held for William and Kate, now the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, and Quinn’s expectations were decidedly low.
 
“You think that’s going to be fun?” he asked Imus. “The Archbishop of Canterbury’s the DJ, playing Gregorian Monk hits.”
 
Then Quinn made a socio-political joke that few people would understand, before agreeing with Imus that the late George Carlin would have been let down by today’s festivities.
 
“He’d be gravely disappointed there weren’t riots in the streets,” Imus said.
 
But all-out savagery of the kind Carlin used to root for is becoming increasingly rare, as Quinn sees it. “I think people get all their anger out on Twitter now,” he said.
 
And Quinn should know: he’s an ardent Tweeter, with something like 64,000 people clinging to his every word. “This is really coming down to wars in the streets,” he explained. “You want to have your followers, you want to have your army ready.”
 
He recommended Imus join the Twitter brigades, if for no other reason than he’d have half the state of New Mexico following him in a heartbeat. “They’re psychotic down there,” Quinn added, trying to be helpful.
 
Following the success of his one-man show “Long Story Short” on Broadway and on HBO, Quinn is in high demand in places as glamorous as…Philadelphia, where he’ll perform “Long Story Short” for two weeks in June and July.
 
“Philadelphia in July is beautiful,” he assured Imus. “Like April in Paris.”
 
-Julie Kanfer