Glenn Beck Not Totally Against On-Air Suicide

A man with about the same barometer for taste as Imus, FOX News's Glenn Beck, agreed that sponsorship of the I-Man's cancer treatment would be an excellent idea.

"I've been looking for [a book] on how to make your cancer worse," Beck told Imus.

Beck, whose "Evita moment" came when he addressed protesters at the Alamo last week, believes the media misrepresented the Tax Day rallies that were more anti-spending than anything else.

"A lot of [the protesters] were Conservatives who felt like Bush wasn't listening to them, because Bush was a big government, big spending guy," Beck said. "Then they get John McCain as their candidate, so they take to the streets after this new guy comes in and spends even more money."

Obama's response to the rallies was to say he had not been aware of their existence, which Beck compared to sticking "a hot fork" in the eyes of the demonstrators. While they were on topic, Imus wondered if Beck was familiar with the term "tea-bagging," which, if you ask us, has become something of an obsession lately on this show.

"Can somebody get HR on the phone?" Beck demanded. "This is a very hostile envronment."

After Imus explained how cool it was that Anderson Cooper had referenced the act of "tea-bagging" on CNN last week, he learned that Beck's stance on gay marriage is similar to Obama's.

"What kind of hate monger says that civil marriages shouldn't happen?" Beck said. "What kind of person says, 'Oh no, you guys can't do what you want to do?'"

He does, however, believe there is a place for traditional marriage to be defined as between a man and a woman. Imus shared a story with Beck about his two gay friends who visited the Imus Ranch, which somehow led to a revelation that one of the trails at the Ranch is called "Butt Hill."

"When you were booking the show, did you say, 'You know, we need to talk about Butt Hill, and Glenn Beck is the perfect guy?'" Beck asked.

Beck will soon embark on his own version of a stand-up comedy tour, which he said will be therapeutic for him. "I've got a few things to get out of my system," he added.

Another candidate for therapy is Bo Dietl, who Beck said nearly had a full-fledged aneurysm when he appeared on FOX News's Glenn Beck program a few weeks back.

"I thought we were going to have a death live on television," said Beck. "Which I wouldn't have been opposed to."

Imus is concerned that someday, Beck might be the one whose death occurs on air.

"We're pointing toward a time when you put a shotgun in your mouth on television and pull the trigger," Imus told his slightly unhinged guest, who agreed that an on-air self-inflicted gunshot would make for interesting television.

"I don't mean it would be great, like, 'Hey let's watch that again!'" Beck said. "But you would watch it again!"

-Julie Kanfer