Dick Gregory Announces Hunger Strike

Legendary comedian and social activist Dick Gregory stopped by for a chat with Imus today. He made some keen observations, and one pretty important announcement.

Having recently celebrated his 50th wedding anniversary, Gregory admitted he had begun studying international humanitarian concerns.

"There's got to be something in the Geneva Conventions about being with the same person for 50 years," he said. "There's got to be a bonus somewhere!"

He said the key to a happy marriage was being loveable. Also, the threat of physical pain helps. "She said, if you ever leave me I will hurt you," Gregory said.

Gregory was amazed by the commercials for drugs like Cialis, whereby one is instructed to visit the emergency room if an erection lasts more than four hours. "Where I come from, that's called a treat!" he said. "You go back to the pharmacist and tip the guy."

Informed that Imus did not invest his money in the stock market, Gregory said one of his cousin's had because "he thought Dow Jones was a brother."

Then, Gregory surprised Imus with a gift. A doorstop. At first the I-Man seemed both confused and disappointed with the strange offering, but didn't want to hurt his guest's feelings.

"Hey, a doorstop!" Imus chirped. "This is great!"

The gift was a form of protection for Imus when he travels, so that even if he croaks in his sleep in a hotel room with the chain lock on, the traveling doorstop will ensure no man passes through to claim the body. Brilliant.

On a serious note, Gregory touched on the economic, and by extension social, crisis in the United States. "I travel all over the country and I have never, ever, ever watched Americans go through the changes they're going through," he said, pointing out the differences between this current mess and the Great Depression. "In the last Depression, no one had nothing...now people are watching commercials, they see food. It's one thing being hungry, it's another thing watching it."

He believes that the only thing worse than being sick is worrying about becoming sick, with no job and no money. "If I hurt my leg, my leg is hurt," he said. "If I'm worried, that's my mind! That's a mental thing. You're going to see more and more of that."

To bring attention to the issues of hunger and health, Gregory is embarking on a hunger strike until the economy changes. He's done them before, but this one is different. "I didn't get frightened even when death was looking me in the face during the [civil rights] movement," he said. "I'm frightened about this one."

He'll drink only water and some fruit juice, and will eat no solids. "When you wake up in the morning, read the obituaries, and see how many fasters are in there," Gregory advised. "It's the eaters that are dying!"

-Julie Kanfer