Blonde on Blonde: Egypt, Breasts, and Jennifer Aniston

The horrible news broke yesterday that in the midst of Friday’s celebrations in Cairo’s Liberation Square, where protesters were overcome by news that President Hosni Mubarak had officially stepped down, CBS News Foreign Affairs Correspondent Lara Logan was separated from her crew and security, and subsequently beaten and sexually assaulted. Though the U.S. has a long history of sending brave journalists to cover horrific situations around the world, Imus wondered during Blonde on Blonde today whether it might be particularly unsafe, at times, to send women reporters.
 
“Of course not,” Lis Wiehl quickly replied, and suspected that Logan herself would feel similarly. “A horrible tragedy does not beget getting rid of women going overseas and covering everything.”
 
Deirdre agreed, calling Logan courageous, but noted that perhaps the seasoned correspondent should have darkened her light hair and covered her head, so as to be less conspicuous. “A pretty, blonde woman in the middle, sticking out, is more of a target,” Deirdre said.
 
Lis, however, cautioned Deirdre against that line of thinking. “That’s not any way to excuse what happened to her,” Lis pointed out.
 
As Egypt, which is currently under military rule, prepares to rewrite its suspended constitution, eight different parties have been approached to provide input, among them a member of the Muslim Brotherhood, the banned—but highly organized—political organization with ties to extremism.
 
“How is this, in anyone’s sane mind, the right thing to do?” Deirdre said. She believes that including a representative from the Muslim Brotherhood in such sensitive matters in Egypt would be akin to including terrorists in a comparable discussion in the U.S.
 
“To be fair,” Lis began, “This is one person out of eight. The other panelists are esteemed jurists from across the country, totally middle of the road, very conservative.”
 
Still, Deirdre noted, “The decision is being based on fear, rather than the right thing to do.”
 
Hoping to diffuse the rising tension, Imus said, “Let’s talk about breasts.”
 
Specifically, Imus wanted to address Michelle Obama’s plan to promote breastfeeding, and the IRS’s announcement that it will give a tax break to nursing mothers. Both Lis and Deirdre are proponents of breastfeeding, having done it themselves, but Lis acknowledged it’s not easy for everybody to do, particularly working mothers.
 
“It’s discrimination, because some women can’t breastfeed,” she said, even though, as Deirdre pointed out, upwards of 75 percent do, and it’s much healthier for babies than giving them chemical-laden formula.
 
“Deirdre breast fed,” Imus said, redundantly. “And then we had Wyatt.”
 
Though Imus (and, doubtless, Bernard, Lou, and Charles) could spend all morning talking about breasts, he moved on, and wondered why tabloids report news of Jennifer Aniston’s happiness as if it’s the last thing the Hollywood darling, who is 42 and single, has any business being.
 
“A desperate, pathetic woman in her forties,” Lis said. “Finally, I can be an expert on something!”
 
Deirdre, for one, was skeptical that Aniston is as happy as she claims to be. “She wants a man,” Deirdre said. “She just can’t find a man.”
 
For once, Imus agreed with his wife, but not for the right reasons. “Jennifer Aniston is not happy, and here’s why she’s not happy,” Imus said. “She’s not happy because nobody’s happy.”
 
And, we’re back.
 
-Julie Kanfer