Bo Dietl Takes Advantage of I-Man's Sniffles

Like everybody else in New York and around the country, Bo Dietl has been following “this mosque thing,” whereby New York City officials have granted permission to a Muslim group to build a mosque and community center just blocks from Ground Zero in downtown Manhattan.

“Whether you’re a Republican or a Democrat, there are other people that feel certain things,” said Bo, who was granted more time than usual to speak this morning due to Imus’s prolonged sneezing fit. “Three-thousand Americans died down at Ground Zero there, and to build a monument to a religion that was involved in taking the World Trade Center down…I think people should really think about it.”

Not that Bo has any problem with the Muslim faith; he, like a majority of Americans, merely wants the mosque built elsewhere in New York City. “It’s like us building a United States embassy in Hiroshima, right in the middle of their sacred ground where a lot of Japanese people were killed,” he said.

Bo went on a bit longer, until Imus finally intervened by pointing out, “This is like a dream appearance for you, because I can’t talk.”

Continuing to take advantage of Imus’s dire condition, Bo commented that even New York Governor David Paterson, with whom Bo dined at Rao’s last week, agrees that the mosque should be built elsewhere.

Asked what he and the Governor talked about at Rao’s, Bo was coy, saying only that Paterson is continuing to work hard despite his status as a lame-duck Governor. Paterson told Bo he solved the state’s budget crisis by refusing the pay lawmakers until they passed a budget. “I have a lot of respect for Governor Paterson,” he concluded, finally.

A former NYPD detective, Bo had no “remorse-itation” for the alleged Craiglist killer in Massachusetts who off-ed himself in jail over the weekend. “As far as I’m concerned, we saved a lot of money by him killing himself,” said Bo. “And you know what? More killers should kills themselves and save us a lot of money.”

And while he’s on the subject of money, Bo expressed his anger toward Mayor Bloomberg for giving a $110,000 grant to Rev. Al Sharpton’s National Action Network.  

“I’ve wondered why Sharpton hasn’t been very negatory toward the Mayor,” said Bo, leaving us to wonder whether “negatory” is even a word.

(Hint: It isn’t.)

-Julie Kanfer