Bo Dietl Tries to Say "al-Awlaki"

Looking slightly better than he did last week, Bo Dietl felt good today, and, at 59, has come to terms with the aging process.

"Looking at you makes me feel good," he told Imus. "You look very good this morning — the jacket, the shirt, and the hat."

Imus's hair, Bo added, looked "extra good" today, which led to extended discourse on the difficulty of making it look good. Imus praised the Fox hair department's efforts, saying that they've "got it goin' on."

Bo was chomping at the bit today, eager to talk about "al-wacky," the Yemen-based radical Muslim cleric (real name is Anwar al-Awlaki) who has been linked to both the Ft. Hood shooter and the underwear bomber.

"We gotta do one of those cruise missiles and send him to Never-Never-land," said Bo, who believes the U.S. is "missing the target" with its sky marshal program.

"You've got to get yourself involved before they get on the plane," he said, drawing his conclusion from the Christmas Day attempt by an Islamic extremist to blow up a jetliner over Detroit "Use the sky marshals at the embarkation where people are going on the planes, like the Israelis. Talk to people who look suspicious and act suspiciously."

Besides, he added, "If you got three sky marshals on a 747, and you got one of these nitwits that gets on a plane with a little condom full of PETN and he's got his little injection going, you're not going to stop him."

He insisted that hose who wish to bring harm to the U.S. via plane or other methods will become ever more creative. "There are supposedly over 20 others being trained in Yemen to get on these planes," said Bo.

He advocated for serious action. "We have to make friends with the Yemen government, and send these cruise missiles in to where they might be," he said, referring to the Al-Qaeda linked organizations in the country. "I'm sorry if it's a religious area. You gotta take the religious area out."

Bo admitted he is becoming more pious as he gets older, but was unwilling to choose between the 8.5-point baby Jesus and the full-grown Jesus. He did, however, state his belief that certain Italian people are getting too hysterical about the alleged stereotypes portrayed by the cast of MTV's hit show "Jersey Shore."

"So these kids want to work out and look a little guido," said Bo, also Italian. "Good for them."

-Julie Kanfer