Was Bo Dietl Suffering From Seasonal Affective Disorder?

The holiday season makes Bo Dietl melancholy, but luckily Imus had some suggestions for how Bo could turn that frown upside down:

Get some drugs
Have a drink
Hire a hooker

But none appealed to Bo, who instead waxed nostalgic for a more innocent time.

"This is not about Jews, Muslims, or Christians," he said. "It's about happiness. It's a weird feeling of depression. You think about loved ones who have passed. You say to yourself, 'I wish I could turn the clock back 20 years and know what I know now.'"

In an effort to prevent Bo from offing himself on national radio and television, Imus changed subjects to the upcoming, and hopefully less depressive, guests on today's show: Congressman Anthony Weiner, from New York, and Senator John Thune, from South Dakota.

"I like South Dakota, I think it's a real American state," said Bo. "New York is very liberal-ization-ized."

Bo loves his home state, and would never live anywhere else, like Copenhagen, where the climate summit is being held. Bo's "friend" George Soros went out there and recommended the International Monetary Fund give money to Third World countries so they can combat the effects of global warming.

"It's a scam for these Third World countries to buy cocaine and hookers," said Imus. "Which maybe you should do, and cheer up!"

But Bo had no intentions of getting happy, as he moved on to the even more upsetting topic of the U.S. Navy SEALs accused of abusing a terrorist who killed and burned four Americans in Iraq.

"The U.S. Congress should take this up," he said. "You should talk to Mr. Weiner..."

But all Imus could do was laugh, because Bo said "weiner."

"The problem is," Imus said. "I'm 11 years old."

-Julie Kanfer